This article has been written by parenting author and blogger Becky Goddard-Hill.
Neurodivergence is a term for people whose brains function differently in ways than are considered standard or typical (neurotypical)
Neurodivergent conditions include Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD), Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder, Dyspraxia, Dyslexia, Dysgraphia (and others)
Your child may have a diagnosis or be on a (long) waiting list for assessment. You may not even be on this path but still have awareness that your child needs additional support to thrive in a neurotypical setting– and if attending school, this is an area to consider.
Prepping the school, and your child, for their return has huge benefits.
Prep your school
Advocacy
Some schools will work closely with your family to provide support and adjustments before your child returns.
Others may have less experience or resources to meet individual need and this will require you to be more pro-active on behalf of your child.
Do ask for a pre-return meeting if one is not prearranged.
Perhaps take a professional or even a friend with you for support. Jot down what you want to say and ask before you go and record what is said. At the meeting agree a named contact you can email directly and share urgent information with so there is a clear line of communication.
Create a problem-solving plan
Having a plan in place for your child before they go back to school helps everyone involved.
Talk over which aspects of school life your child would like to be different and problem solve this with them and the school ahead of their return:
Does the rush to leave the classroom at the end of the day stress them out? What would help? Could they leave 5 minutes earlier?
Does your child get sensory-overload and need time out occasionally? If so, how can they access this?
Sorting these issues out ahead of time can prevent them becoming problematic.
Share a profile
Writing up a short profile of your child, including strengths, special interests, communication-style and challenges will be an asset to teachers. Many have large classes and will take time to know your child individually.
A profile helps get key points across quickly e.g. it’s useful for a teacher to know your child may struggle with eye contact due to ASD but that it does not affect their attention and they are not being rude.
Prep your child
Returning to school can create anxiety and fear of separation in any child but for a neurodivergent child these emotions may be amplified.
Here are some things that can help:
Begin the conversation early
Don’t put off talking about returning to school for fear it will stress your child out. The sooner you begin the conversation the clearer it will be to your child this is happening soon and that preparations are in place to make this as smooth as possible.
Discuss what went well the year before and what they are excited about for the year ahead.
Give your child key information
Share their schedule with them and the name of their teacher. Run through what a typical day will look like, where and what they will eat, and the plan for getting to and from school.
Create a visual reminder if this helps or write them up a timetable for their day.
If possible, get their schedule ahead of the school return and arrange a visit their new teacher and classroom.
Familiarity with what is ahead will reduce anxiety and hopefully get your child feeling more comfortable and confident.
Do a run through
A practice run for your child of waking up at a certain time, breakfast and the school run will help them be prepared and also highlight any areas you may need to work on.
Try on their uniform with them so they get used to the feel of it- again this will alert you to any issues such as struggling with a tie or uncomfortable football socks! Troubleshooting ahead of time saves stress later.
Exude positivity
Even if you feel anxious about your child returning to school it is worth remembering that emotions are contagious. Aim for calm, prepared, in control and positive. Your child will take their lead from you.
Don’t overschedule!
Being back at school can be overwhelming: a new routine, lots of people sounds, smells, expectations, separation from key caregivers. Try and be around as much as possible during the back to school period and avoid overscheduling evenings for your child. Build in quiet times and a time to talk over their day.
And finally …
Start moving your child’s sleep and wake-up time back toward the school schedule at least a week before school begins. A sleep deprived child will only fret and stress more and you are aiming for calm!